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Angielskie dowcipy / Blonde

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Got Milk?

When the milkman read the note he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of mil... [cały ->]

I hurt all over!

A young woman said to her doctor, 'You have to help me, I hurt all over!' 'What do you mean?' said the doctor. The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled,'Ow, that hurts.' Then she touched her left cheek and again yell... [cały ->]

Ice-fishing Blonde

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on the subject, and finally, after getting all the necessary "tools" together, she made for the nearest frozen lake. After positioning her comfy stool, she started to make a circular cut in the... [cały ->]

Locked Car

Two blondes observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. Blonde#1: I can't seem to get this door unlocked! Blonde#2: Well, you'd better hurry up and try harder, its starting to rain and the top is do... [cały ->]

Mirror, Mirror

Two blondes, Carol and Sandi, were walking down the street. Carol noticed a compact on the sidewalk and leaned down to pick it up. She opened it, looked in the mirror and said, "Hmmm, this person looks familiar." Sandi said, "Let me look!" So C... [cały ->]

Name That Capital

A blonde was complaining to her friend about constantly being called a dumb blonde. Her friend tells her "go do something to prove them wrong! Why don't you learn all the state capitals or something?" The blonde thinks this is a great idea, and locks... [cały ->]

On the right track?

A brunette was walking on the railroad tracks saying, "21... 21.... 21...." when a blonde jumped on. A train came and the brunette jumped off...the train hit the blonde. The Brunette then got back onto the tracks and started saying, "22.....22..... [cały ->]

On the road again

One bright sunny day, a beautiful blonde girl was cruising the countryside in her new, shiny red sports car. Suddenly, she jammed on the brakes, and she brought the car to a sideways, screeching halt. She quickly jumped out of the car, and ran up the... [cały ->]

Painting Contractor

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!". In the second room she told t... [cały ->]

Play Pens

Mary Simpson was almost crazy with her three kids. She complained to her best friend, "They're driving me nuts. Such pests, they give me no rest and I'm half-way to the nut hatch." "What you need is a playpen to separate the kids from yourself," h... [cały ->]

Pronounce it please!

Two tourists were driving through Louisiana. As they were approaching Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked... [cały ->]

Show Me Your License

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday one of you takes away my license and then today you expect me ... [cały ->]

So Relieved!

A blonde meets up with a friend as she's picking up her car from the mechanic. "Everything ok with your car now?" "Yes, thank goodness," the blonde replies. "Weren't you worried the mechanic might try to rip you off?" "Yeah, but he didn't. ... [cały ->]

The Aligator Blonde!

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no hagg... [cały ->]

The Blond and the Brunette

There was a Blond and a Brunette on an airplane. All of a sudden the engine blew and they started to crash! There was only one parachute and a flashlight. The Brunette grabbed the parachute and the flashlight and said to the blond, "Ok, This is ... [cały ->]

najlepsze angielskie dowcipy